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My name is Alberto the Clown. Welcome to my website,
where you will learn all about me and my friends.
I’m a clown in a very important position in United States government. I’m what is known in the clown world as a "Politiclown". My close friend and circus sidekick Spurious George made me Attorney General of the United States. That means I have been given a promotion from simple Politiclown to Court Jester. What are the duties of the Court Jester? Well, I don’t really know. So I kind of make it up as I go along. It's called "improvisation", or "Improv" for short. Clowns are very clever that way. We also have to be good at performing tricks. My latest and greatest trick ever is making Amendments to the Constitution of the United States disappear with a stroke of my magic plume! Poof! You should see me do it! It’s an amazing trick, and no other politiclown has ever successfully done it before. |
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How do I do it? I can’t give away my secrets (because then they wouldn’t be secret, ho ho!), but I can tell you that
with a little sleight of hand and magic dust I can sidestep amendments and take away individual rights that most people
believed were guaranteed. And with the help of my chum, Spurious George, I might even be able to prevent some people
from attaining equal rights! It’s really quite a spectacular show, full of smoke and mirrors, and clever language! You
should see people’s expressions when they find out that their Constitutional rights are not carved in stone, but written
on flimsy old paper that I can make disappear very easily if I want to.
Between practicing new and creative tricks to make Constitutional Amendments disappear and making excuses for Spurious George’s behavior, my day is pretty full. I barely have time to work on prosecuting really bad people. It’s not always easy being Court Jester! | |
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